By Dr. Challa Subrahmanyam, Psychology
Marriages require the maximum efforts from both the individuals. Given the growing concept of individualism and personal independence, people fail to put in or sometimes understand the requirement of working towards their marriage, leaving them searching for an escape route as soon as the going gets tough. Marital issues may lead to major individual psychological problems with each partner trying to hurt the other emotionally as the relationship gets bitter. Consequently, divorce rates in this country have shown a considerable increase in the past decade.
This article should help you figure out some of the ways to save and improve the bond that is marriage while keeping the importance of individualism and personal space in mind-
Teamwork: It is essential for both the individuals to work towards their marriage and show equal commitment. With only one person trying to build a better relationship while the other one shows minimal effort and goes astray reduces the sense of belongingness; eventually leading to estrangement.
Take Responsibility: Apologize when it’s your mistake and take responsibility for your actions, instead of going around in a continuous loop of the blame game.
Keep the Spark Alive: Take out time for each other whenever possible. A simple date night once in awhile or a weekend getaway with undivided attention to the partner helps to keep the romance alive in long term relationships which more often than not fades away with time, without effort from the partners.
Appreciate: Appreciating the partner’s efforts are probably the most important factor in any marriage. It avoids the individual feeling as though he/she has been taken for granted; which is the root cause of most marital problems.
Therapy: Marital therapy is usually beneficial when people are unable to deal with their differences within the marriage. Some therapists use a client-centred approach in understanding the issues. In a collectivist society like ours, family therapy is usually used because the family of both the partners play a major role in their lives.